Dear Professor Shelly,
The paper that you will receive from me tonight will be pure and utter crap. I can tell you this much already because it is due at 6pm and it is now 3:25. You are correct in your probable assumption that it is not yet started.
This illustrates not only laziness and exhaustion, but also complete stupidity on my part. You see, I need to pull my Social Studies GPA up 3 three tenths of a point this semester in order for me to student teach in September, and generally get my life out of the crapper. This will not happen unless I receive an A in your class. Even now, as I type this, the time ticks away, and I am no closer to beginning the paper than the moment before. I keep telling myself that I can complete four pages in a little over two hours, so there is no need to worry. If this were the case, why didn't I take two hours last night to complete them? At the time, sleep seemed much more important.
You may wonder what possesses me to make such stupid decisions, and how else I spent my time. I can tell you that I have no reasons or reward to show for my disgraceful procrastination.
In all of your years of teaching, I'm sure this paper will be the jewel in the Crap Crown of Academics.
Congratulations on being the recipient.
Later,
Sorry Student
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4 comments:
oh no!!! did you make it?
(sounds like me and psychology, by the way :))
I used to write my best stuff under pressure when I was in college. Can't wait to hear how it went.
I have a feeling it won't be as ad as you thought......but praying for ya just the same. I'm with Kaymac--- some of us actually produce better under pressure... although... for me oculd be a nice excuse for last minuting my life;)
This post is the story of my academic career. I thought grad school would make me not do such things, but the amount of work they give is such that the practice has increased at ungodly rates. I feel for you, but I have a take home midterm I have neglected for a week I have to go start now.
Love you!
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